Loving Devoted Husband

Have you ever noticed how easy it is today to get a divorce? Really, divorce should not be a common word in our vocabulary but it is. Has divorce gotten out of hand? As a husband I think divorce has gotten out of hand. I consider it to be one of the ugliest words in our everyday life.

It saddens me to see children without their fathers to guide them or mothers to nurture them, women who long for the comfort and security of a loving husband to care for them, fathers who are unable to see their children because of unjust court orders.

Yes, I know that sometimes divorce is needed and it should be reserved for the most extreme cases like sexual immorality or verbal and physical abuse but it has become a child’s playground where any hurt feelings is grounds for divorce. I think it’s selfish to think of ones self rather than focusing on loving unconditional.

Marriage is hard work but it is also one of the strongest bonds between a husband and wife. Children take notice of that strengthening bond of love and grow up relying on that security in order to build their own character.

Based on my own experience I have found that the solution to a lot of indifference is the lack of properly listening to the other person. As individuals we often give an answer to a question then add our opinions as well but that’s not what the other person wanted to hear. It’s confusing.

When communication gets to be a problem then it’s time to go back and start simple by asking questions requiring short answers. When explaining something, allow time between the explanations for your spouse to acknowledge with feedback. This will also be a time to see if the other person is interested or not.

There are a lot of books on communication for married couples but I believe the key is in learning how to listen. I also believe that timing is another factor which needs to be considered because you want your spouse’s complete attention. Then there are times when you just have to listen and be a sound board for the other person to think out loud and get there thought straight.

Whatever the case may be, remember that conversation is vital to a lasting relationship and learning how to communicate better will bring lasting rewards. So if talking or listening to your spouse is a problem then agree together to start fresh and create new ways to speak and put into practice new skills to focus on. 

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Sometimes as men we fail to listen to our wives counsel because of our egos. I know that because I fall into that trap a lot and after a time of pondering on the subject I quickly realize that she was right.

Remember, God has provided us with a wife for a very important reason. She is our helper in so many ways and it’s only our arrogance that blinds us to all that God provided in her.

A wife’s counsel is one of those wonderful attributes that bring great rewards especially in decision making. I say that because women also gather information about topics of discussion that we men may fail to see. Women’s insight and understanding about subject matters are different than men.

As a man the final decision may still rest upon your shoulders but failing to acknowledge your wife’s counsel shows lack of love and care for her feelings. Hearing and respecting your wife’s words of counsel strengthens communication, brings closer intimacy and builds trust.

Men, this may be one of the hardest things to put into practice but the benefits of doing it brings lasting love and devotion to a successful marriage. The secret of her counsel is that she is expressing her love by sharing with you. It’s a time of intimate love. Enjoy it!
 

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Children are great imitators, at a young age they mimic everything you do. They repeat the same words you say, they duplicate your body language and they do things in the same order as they observe you doing things.

I believe one of the greatest legacies you can leave you children is to let them see how much you love your wife. When they see their parents expressing acts of love to one another, your children remember it for life and that love becomes the foundation to relationships they will have later in life.

You ever wonder why a young lady looks for someone like her dad. It’s because that’s all she knows and has been exposed to growing up for eighteen years. Even a young man picks up on how well you treat your wife and will do the same when he gets married.

Children see everything, even down to your body language and facial expressions. Now I know at times they will see disagreements but do your best to keep those behind closed doors. If they do happen to see you debating something, do it with love so that they can learn how to resolve disagreements with others and their own spouses in the future.

Therefore make the effort to set a good example for your children because the love and devotion you express now is what your children see, even when you think they are not watching. So always be in a loving relationship with your spouse and witness the beautiful benefits of your children’s loving nature.

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The subject of communication is one that needs to be reinforced daily because of its importance in a relationship.

Talking with your wife and kids is a vital part to any growth of love in the family. The reason behind sharing in conversation is to get to know the other person. By speaking to them you learn their love language and by knowing what makes them feel loved, you can see clearly when it is needed.

I will admit it does take some effort to do but the benefits of having them come to you for help and comfort makes it all seem effortless.

Conversation also brings along a friendship and a trust that will last through the rough times and the good ones. It’s to know without a doubt that someone will always be there to listen.

Wives are the husband’s inner strength and the better you know her, the stronger you will be as a loving husband. In the same way your kids are the inheritance of that emotional strength because talking with them builds a lasting trust they will carry to their own relationship with others.

Communication can’t be dismissed easily because eventually it will take place. As a loving husband and father make sure you are the one they want to talk with. Otherwise they will find someone who will listen and that can lead to lost love in the family and possibly put you in some broken family statistic. Heaven forbid!

So make a point of talking and sharing with your wife and kids. Be the knight in shinning armor for your wife and the strong tower for the kids. Make the sacrifice now and plant those seeds of communication then watch the effort of your patients flourish into beautiful flowers of loving harvest.

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You love her by being there when she needs to be held.

You love her by spending intimate and quality time with her.

You love her by providing and caring for her.

You love her by listening and talking to her.

You love her by complimenting her with words of affirmation.

You love her with gifts and taking her out on dates.

You love her by saying “I Love You” to her daily.

To love her means you sacrifice your life for her and in return she does the same making you one with each other and that love will overcome all adversities in life.

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So, what are the delicate days? It’s those few days in a young women’s life that makes her uncomfortable and irritable. If you are a married man you know which days I am talking about. That’s right, PMS.

This is the time when a man’s love and care for his wife is really tested. Test such as of patients, how much you love her, being a conversational sound board and many other areas that will test the endurance of a man. It’s a time when each man has to walk a fine line of being a servant to his wife’s needs and like egg shells, your wife’s feeling can easily be crushed if not careful.

It’s also days of sacrifice because the first inclination is to run out of the house and wait for this time to pass. Trust me sometimes that will only add fuel to the fire that is already raging in her emotions. Therefore going out with the boys or retreating to your own comfort zone may not be a good idea.

Now if you need help in gaining a few brownie points, here are a few suggestions. Make sure the car she uses has a full tank of gas. Make a point of cooking the meals and washing the dishes. Give the kids a bath and put them to bed. Do some cleaning around the house and always surprise her with hugs and words of affirmation.

Basically help by doing a lot of the little things she does around the house. Remember that it may seem a little hectic at times and you may make a few mistakes along the way but keep trying. There may be times when you think your sacrifice goes unnoticed.

Believe me, she will notice and the rewards following the end of those days will be surprisingly wonderful and worth every effort and sacrificing moment. Love and romance will take on a new meaning as you show how much you care and love her.

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One of the greatest acts of love is caring for someone who is sick or injured. God’s word clearly identifies that in the story of the Good Samaritan. This gentle, yet powerful act of love binds people together in a miraculous way. Whether it’s husband and wife or parent and child the results are still the same.

A husband showing this caring love is extremely important and vital to his family because it’s his strength and devotion that the family wants from the leader of the family. He becomes the anchor of life that holds them secure and without that anchor the family looks elsewhere and foundations crumble.

Another great act of love is always being there for your wife and children. This simple act of sacrifice, humility, and service is the life blood of a man’s family. It’s a love that deposits endless devotion and reaps the benefit of love.

Think about it, will a few extra hours at work make a difference when you could be on a dinner date with your wife securing a romance that will last forever. What about when your friends call you on a Saturday to play golf and your son is waiting to play baseball. Do you make the decision that will impact your son’s life of trust and promise or do you chase a small ball that only brings a brief moment of fun.

Acts of love are not optional. It’s a choice that has monumental effects on a man’s legacy. Being a loving husband and caring father will be difficult at times but the end result of love is a treasure to behold and a reward of timeless peace.

So invest the time of expressing acts of love to your family and watch how God will richly bless your marriage and ring laughter in your children’s hearts. God Bless!

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Having and getting an accountability partner is something I have been hearing a lot of lately. So, what is an accountability partner?

Basically, it’s a person you give permission to ask you the hard question regarding your actions and holding you accountable to your word. It’s also a person you tell what your goals are and having that person available to talk with when you need encouragement.

This person can be a parent, business associate, respectable mentor, trusted coach and yes, a loving and devoted spouse.

The more I thought about an accountability partner and possibly getting one. That’s when I realized, I already have the best accountability partner, my wife.

She is my friend. She knows my strengths and weaknesses. She knows my potential and what motivates me to succeed. We share the same interest of being self employed and entrepreneurs. Most of all she cares and loves me for who I am, a true partner in every sense and a blessing from God.

Now I will agree that some people do need another person of the same gender to fully understand and relate to certain issues but that’s what friends are for.

Having your spouse as an accountability partner can be a wonderful thing and it takes a great deal of understanding to accomplish the richness of it. Thereby, having good communication skills is vital to that relationship and keeping the end goal in mind which is accountability.

Be careful that the accountability is not used to belittle one another but to enrich the love and intimacy in each other and helping the other person to be self-discipline, confidence, patience, motivated and overall a better person. The key secret is be accountable for your actions, trust me your wife will love you more for it.

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One of the saddest things I witnessed one day was hearing a man belittle his wife with negative words while she was away. It bothered me so much that I immediately told him that he should not say things like that.

When I hear of men doing that it tells me that their marriage is lacking in love, something maybe interfering like certain needs not being met or it may be an argument they just had. Regardless of what the cause, it’s no reason to belittle them in front of others, especially if it’s your wife.

If a man is verbally saying negative comments about their spouse, I can only imagine the negative thoughts they are entertaining or how bad they think of themselves.

Wives are a lovely gift from God to help her husband and finding a wife is a good thing. The loving words we speak to them or about them in public is like taking a soft cloth and polishing her to shine even brighter. On the other hand, words that belittle her is like taking sandpaper which dulls and takes away from her beauty.

Words of affirmation is like a breath of fresh air to a women, it energizes her, she feels loved, rests in security and her self-esteem flourishes like a new spring flower. Her beauty only increases and magnifies to the level of importance for her husbands needs.

Men, remember the love that drew you to your wife, she is still the wonderful person you said “I do” to. She still needs your caring and loving words as well your wonderful thoughts of her when she is not around.

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What is pampering? Pampering is simply to treat with extreme care. Women like to be pampered and if you want to be a loving husband, pampering your wife is showing that you do love and care for her deeply.

After a few years of marriage most men take this for granted but believe me when I tell you that she has not forgotten. This is something that has to be put in practice on a routine basis and not just on Valentines Day.

So here are a few suggestions to help you put things into practice.

Let us start in the kitchen. After your wife has finished preparing a wonderful meal for the family and everyone is full. Go up to her and tell her to take it easy for the evening and inform her that you will take care of cleaning the kitchen and putting away the leftovers. Then go beyond what you told her and clean the kitchen thoroughly and put things in there places so she will have a sparkling kitchen to be proud of the next day

If she works outside the home make a point of massaging her shoulders and feet when she comes home. Also take time to listen to her is she had a stressful day. Be the soundboard and let her vent and clear her mind as you just listen then give her a hug and kiss letting her know that she is loved at home.

Take her out on a dinner date to her favorite restaurant and take time to get dressed up and put on the cologne she enjoys. Afterwards take her out shopping or for a walk somewhere holding her hand.

If you are uncomfortable with some of these then make a point of looking for things to help her. Things like making sure her car is always full of gas, always making sure the trash is taken out, put the kids to bed, wash dishes or start by taking over the simple task of grocery shopping.

The key to remember here is that your wife is a special lady in your life and it’s up to you to pamper her so she feels special. So as you read this post start making plans to surprise her with a little pampering.

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